GOING COMMANDO IN THE HIGHLANDS

Of Kilts - Men and Malts

The fascination of men in Kilts emits a little nudge and wink from me, who unashamedly every now and again, goes commando too, without the slightest bit of twinge, and no one is ever the wiser.

However, my captivation goes beyond kilts. The Scottish persona is fascination by itself. Stoic, tough, no nonsense attitude, generosity with the heart but frugal with the purse, has a great sense of humor, produces the most artistic and clever entertainers. My heartthrobs range from Sean Connery to Ewan McGregor with Rod Stewart in between. Billy Connolly tickles my funny bones, and Jackie Stewart speeds up my adrenalin.

Sir Sean Connery

Rod Stewart

Ewan McGregor

But the discovery of their delectable liquid amber, Scotch Whisky has me weak at the knees. Sometimes, quite literally. Few men have done that.

For wine lovers, wine tasting vacations like Napa Valley are dream holidays.

For Scotch Whisky lovers like myself, touring the Highland and the Lowland Whisky Trails in Scotland would be my paradise vacation. Now if I was a big, strong Scottish lass, use to the rough weather and hardy lifestyle, a wee dram would be a normal choice of drink. But because of my petite Asian profile, small boned and quite vertically challenged, (a polite way of saying short) this defies the simple logic of my small body’s absorption of alcohol. You see, my consumption exceeds what a small frame person can take.

Rather than show off my drinking capacity, which is not what this is about, let me show you the types of malts and men there are in the highlands and lowlands.

Scotch malt whiskies are divided into five main regions, Highland, Lowland, Islay, Speyside and Campbeltown. I am a wee bit bias on Highland single malts and can sing raptures on them to Kingdom come.

Cardhu Country House

Cardhu Country House in Speyside is where we park ourselves for a short two days for a mini Whisky Trail. It is a great place to stay, with such a warm welcome from wonderful owners.

The temperature outside checks in at 4°C and forecasted at 1°C by lunch time. The morning starts off with a good Scottish breakfast, Porridge with Whisky and cream, is perhaps not my normal cereal starter but the brown sugar sprinkled over thick cream with a jigger of whisky was sensational. This will definitely keep me warm.

The next course was buttered Scottish Moray coast kippers, served with brown bread. If you have never had kippers, be prepared for something extraordinarily delicious. Salted and smoked over smoldering oak chips, it is pan-fried with butter.

Downing my third cup of coffee, I am ready to put on my coat and boots for the Whisky trail. But alas, the Scots take breakfast quite seriously and my third course is a beautiful cheese omlette done to perfection. A small bowl of fruits followed with more coffee – please this is more than enough….wishfully thinking that I would never need another meal until the morrow. How foolish to think that in this cold weather, the body requires solid sensible replenishing of fat, proteins to keep warm and line the stomach for my whisky trail expedition.

The Whisky Trail for me started a little further away from the Country House, for my love of the MacCallan single malt has been voted as the top choice.

Tasting note by the Sunday Times Whisky Club quoted MacCallan as “A rich aroma of Christmas cake, winter spices and leathery Cognac form an enticing nose. The palate is silky with notes of apple fruits and rum-soaked sultanas. The finish is long and honeyed with hints of tangy stone fruit.” I couldn’t agree with them more.

There is one problem when taking part in a Whisky tasting tour, because when sampling the best Whiskies like fine wines, whisky has a much more powerful effect for it is indeed much stronger. Savouring a single malt one after another can have a disastrous effect, so each day is strictly curtailed to only three distilleries at best.

Angus

My Scottish drinking buddy, Angus, wears a kilt and with a wink, informs me that he is a true red head! I did not doubt him. A strong man with ruddy features, has a softer sing-song Scottish accent that I can easily understand. He will make sure I will still be standing up straight by our last distillery visit of the day. We tossed a coin, his favorite Distillery or mine? I won. Assured of his commitment, I fell straight into my favorite Whisky.

Minstrel Barley grown for the Macallan must be low in nitrogen and high in starch, it is a variety grown exclusively to ensure rich flavor. The second most important in whisky making is “water”. Macallan has their own spring deep beneath the ground of the Estate. The “finest cut” from slow distillation is the best of the best. I am bias in my taste of single malt for it must have a darkish amber colour. This is achieved by using oak casks seasoned with Sherry.

At 59.6% my favourite of the Macallan The Library series Cask no. 14007 has a reddish mahogany colour, beautiful oak hint with raisins, apples taste leaving a long lingering full taste. To affirm the taste, I needed a second dram and then a third. Dutifully satisfied, with a bounce in my step, I parted a few pounds for a couple of bottles to take back.

Malt Masters tasting 50 year old Glenfiddich

Our next stop, is “the valley of the deer” – the Gaelic name for Glenfiddich. I was introduced to this wonderful dram on a trip to the Isle of Eriska, near Oban a few decades ago and it proved to be the start of my odyssey of tasting and savoring single malt whisky Glen by Glen.

Angus, my whisky buddy, can definitely take numerous shots. Glenfiddich being his favorite, we lingered longer. The tasting gets quite serious now as the subtle taste of Glenfiddich’s 30 year old was produced. The malt master personally tastes every cask and mixes them to have an exquisite taste of sherry, fig and seductive dark chocolate taste. We then moved onto the 40 year old and found the difference to have infinite richness and harmony, for they choose exceptional casks and marries it with remnants of previous 40 year old vattings. Whilst I am doing relatively fine, although the knees are a wee bit wobbly, buddy here is rapidly dwindling; perhaps he didn’t have the breakfast that I had.

Fresh cold brisk air hits us as we leave the distillery, a decision to walk back was a good choice. For a dinner party awaits us back at the Country House, a brisk walk was the perfect solution to clear the head, get back an appetite for a scrumptious Scottish meal. My host was adamant that I must try Haggis before I leave Speyside, not a dish I am fond of but will give it a fair trial.

We must dress for dinner, so resplendent in my one and only black off the shoulder Armani gown, and still giddy from my day’s whisky adventure, I join everyone in the log fire reception hall. Angus has changed into his McGregor Tartan Clan kilt, purple green with pink stripes and a beautiful tailored jacket, and strategically placed is a curious pouch called a Sporran. Maybe a Sporran is something to protect vulnerable parts of the body since we all know the myth of a bare and naked underbelly of a Scotsman. I will find the courage to ask.

Haggis Neaps & Tatties

The first course served, was the dreaded Haggis. Described as Haggis, Neeps and Tatties stacked with whisky sauce; perhaps, I wildly thought, the sauce will douse other flavors not to my liking. I have to explain. Haggis is a pudding containing sheep’s heart liver and lung minced with onion, oatmeal, spices and stock, incased in sheep’s stomach simmered for a long time. Now you can understand the necessity for the whisky sauce. This is served with mashed turnip and mashed potato.

Hungry as I was, and having unappealingly described it, Haggis is surprisingly tasty, with a nutty texture with a delicious savoury flavor. The whisky sauce did indeed hide some unpleasant parts. It is very much a man’s meal, not for the light hearted or delicate stomach. Angus polished off his plate and grinned knowingly at my aversion to the appetizer for partially finishing mine.

The next course was a beautifully prepared pan fried sea bass, dauphinoise potatoes, green beans, and grilled tomatoes. I was a happy lass finishing all that was on my plate.

Dessert was pure delight. Rhubarb fool with ginger meringues. A platter of cheese was passed around but I found no more room and looked forward to a chance to show off my Scottish highland dancing I had learnt from earlier days.

Determined not to lose a day dedicated to hangovers, I plunged into a two mile jog the next morning. Truly a gargantuan effort but it paid off for arriving back to the house, my counterparts were worse for wear and couldn’t face another Scottish breakfast, let alone watch me tucking into eggs and bacon.

Ardbeg Distillery - Islay

The next whistle stop had to be the island of Islay, the home of Ardbeg, my secret love. The terrain of Islay is sodden with peat and Ardbeg tastes of this richly decayed vegetable matter. Peat forms in wetland conditions, where flooding obstructs flows of oxygen from the atmosphere reducing rates of decomposition. Abundant soft water, fertile soil and acres of precious peat makes this Island a place of pilgrimage for the single malt whisky faithful like myself.

The party now was increased in number as Angus joined us on our flight from Glasgow to Islay to be met by Argyll, welcoming us to the New Hebrides. Whilst Angus is red headed, freckled, and robust, Argyll had dark curly mop, a workout body, blue eyed with a touch of the Irish in him. Although he adamantly says he is born and bred Islayian, not a trace of annoyance as he guides us to the car.

Kilmeny House

Kilmeny house is our destination. Margaret and Blair, the owners of Kilmeny House, greet us warmly with tea and home made cakes.

The Ardbeg tasting tomorrow will be accompanied with both Angus and Argyll but first a Scottish dinner tonight at this unpronounceable restaurant called An Tigh Seinnse in Portnahaven, a basic pub style but comes highly recommended. Situated away from civilization, the door to the pub looked like someone’s house, once in it was teeming with people. A little rustic, but the welcome was warm and friendly. The beef and Guinness pie was delicious and tasty. Portions are large but after a week or so in Scotland, my drinking and eating capacity has increased alongside my fellow Scots.

AN TIGH SEINNSE

Angus recommended the plum crumble whilst Argyll said the bread and butter pudding was the best in the world. The only thing a girl can do under the circumstances was to try a little of both. I detected that the crumble had oatmeal and brown sugar - and the bread and butter pudding had an apricot glazing. Greed is such an unattractive behaviour, so its an either or for the evening.

Ardbeg the most delicisous of the peaty variety. The terrain of Islay is sodden with Peat and Ardbeg tastes of this richly decayed vegetable matter. All good single malts have this crisp watery purity that sets off their other flavors. The smell of Islay is the smell and taste of Ardbeg. The distillery stands on a mound that rises between the buildings and the sea. The sound of waves crashing on the rocks behind. The smell of salt and seaspray sets the atmosphere of Islay.

Ardbeg can trace its origins back to 1794. Both Angus, Argyll and myself tasted the Ardbeg 10 year old. It was quite sweet on the nose, with soft peat, carbolic soap and Arbroath smokies. Extremely long and smoky in the finish.

Ardbeg Uigeadail, from the Uigeadail loch which all Ardbeg waters flow.

A sweet and smoky flavor to this malt.

and Ardbeg "Almost There" 1998. This is mellower, softer more rounder.

It is always hard to choose the best tasting whisky. Peat days or smooth finish days, dependant on the mood. But whatever days, it is my last day in Scotland and I had to ask the question that has been on my mind. Commando or not.....

Both Angus and Argyll practically screamed that they were true Scotsmen.........